Yes, I am still alive! I know, I’ve been gone for a while.
And that leads me right into the topic I want to put out there today.
Whenever you read about successful blogging by the experts anywhere, they tell you that one of the KEY things is to blog regularly. Lots of reasons why and they are all good reasons.
Yet, so many bloggers I know blog in spurts. Does it make me want to read their blogs any less? No, not really, in fact sometimes I find the blogs that give me a great big blog post every single day a bit much, because I will inevitably fall behind.
I am very much a “spurt blogger” too. For weeks, even months, I want to share everything on my blog. I find the time, I take the photos, it all flows nicely. And then I inevitably enter a phase where it’s jut not happening. Usually, something else needs more of my attention, or I am just simply “blogged out” for a bit.
I used to have a lot of guilt about this. After all, I wasn’t doing it right. I was letting my readers down. And it’s not like I don’t have anything to share - I just couldn’t quite get “my act together” to just keep doing it. Surely I would lose every single reader I ever had if I just quit blogging for a month.
Especially if I did that on a semi-regular basis.
But lately, it has occurred to me that first of all, the guilt doesn’t help anybody, least of all me. In fact, if there’s guilt in the way, chances are that blog post are even less likely to happen again, because well, it’s just no fun! Who needs that heaviness?
Second of all, it’s part of who I am. Be it on the blog, be it in my art, be it in real life. I work, play, paint, blog, be an extrovert/introvert in spurts. And I thoroughly enjoy it!
And then I need to retreat a little. Find my center again. Refuel. I enjoy the quiet then. I enjoy focusing on something else for a bit. I enjoy my own company for a bit.
I’m not talking completely exhausting myself, crashing and then needing to retreat to recuperate and “save” myself. Even though, that’s been more my tendency in my earlier years. These days my peaks and valleys are more rolling than spiking. *grin*
What I am saying is, that I have realized that this is, as much as anything else, who I am.
I am a spurt blogger.
I am an introvert with extrovert spurts or an extrovert with introvert spurts and I need both.
For many years I always thought I should be finding the balance between the two at all times. Like, if I were to do a “spot check” on my life at any given time, I should be able to see balance (slightly more or less) between aspects of my life at all times.
And, not surprisingly, I always failed. Then I would beat myself up about not being able to find the balance, etc.
I have come to realize that when I am on fire, when I am inspired, when I am in the thralls of creation - there is no such thing as balance. Not in those moments or phases. The balance will come again, but it’s not there in those moments and phases of creation and change!
I have also realized that this doesn’t mean I am “unbalanced” either.
Much like on an old fashioned scale, when you add weight to one side (or take it away for that matter,) there will be a temporary imbalance as the side that’s being added to will swing to one side. Until you balance it out with the other side. It’s how it works. And it’s a good thing.
Perfect balance at all times would be standstill. And life, the universe and we as human beings - we just don’t do perfect balance/ standstill for any length of time!
And by realizing, accepting, and honoring that I have found much more joy in my life - with both the “peaks” and the “valleys.” Neither is good or bad. They both just are.
And I mean really honoring that. Intellectually we all know that there can’t be balance at all times. This is nothing new.
But to really truly internalize that and enjoy the swinging to the left and to the right of the proverbial scale, and enjoying visiting each side AND the swinging in between, to embrace the chaos that can ensue in the process - that took a little more work for me!
Embracing the chaos and trusting that it will all work out in the end - that’s not only a true act of letting go of control, but of trust and receiving. Not something that comes easily to me. But I am getting better!
In all areas of my life.
And yes, that also means that there may be blog posts every other day for several months. And then there might be nothing. For a month. Or two.
